Prefers testing in production rather than shifting it left to the development phase, risking user-facing issues.
Development Velocity Manipulator
Artificially inflates or deflates development speed metrics to serve their narrative.
Job Security Specialist
Writes complex, hard-to-understand code to make themselves indispensable to the project.
Spends more time in meetings than actual development, reducing productivity.
Git Push --Force
A sly Code Review Hater, simply forces a code push bypassing all governance and policy automation.
Writes code with complex and tangled control structures, making it difficult to maintain and understand.
"Works on my Machine" Certified Developer
Dismisses bugs because the code works on their local setup, ignoring potential environment-specific issues.
Prefers to take unexpected breaks during work-from-home, slowing down the team's progress.
Code Review Hater
Avoids code reviews, leading to unchecked code getting merged into the main branch.
Master of Non-Reproducible Defects
Creates bugs that are hard to reproduce, leading to wasted debugging efforts.
Cloud Platform Engineering
Prefers doing everything manually via UI clicks, rather than automating it using IaC.
Cloud Waste Maintainer
Doesn't optimize cloud resources, leading to wasteful expenditures.
Changes infrastructure configuration directly through the web console, completely ignoring the IaC pipeline.
Master of Vendor Lock-In
Designs systems heavily dependent on a single vendor's technology, limiting flexibility and resilience.
Accidental TF Destroyer
Has a knack for unwittingly running "terraform destroy", erasing infrastructure components accidentally.
Cloud Cost Maximization Expert
Selects the most expensive cloud services without optimizing for cost.
Bare Metal Ambassador
Staunchly advocates for traditional, non-cloud-based solutions, often hindering modernization efforts.
Keeping Dev EC2 Running All Night
Forgets to shut down development instances leading to unnecessary cloud costs.
Site Reliability Engineering
Distributed Monolith Architect
Creates a system that is theoretically distributed but in practice behaves as a single monolithic application.
Designs systems that lack proper redundancy and failover mechanisms, leading to frequent downtimes.
Ignores or turns off important system alerts, often leading to overlooked critical issues.
Unscheduled Maintenance Specialist
Frequently causes unplanned downtime due to their reckless approach to maintenance.
Inflexible Scalability Specialist
Designs systems that resist scaling causing performance bottlenecks and service outages during high demand.
Known for pushing changes directly to production, skipping important testing and staging environments.
Home IP Whitelister
Ensures their home IP is always whitelisted, causing potential security issues.
Sock 2 Compliance
Uses this compliance certification as a shield to avoid implementing essential security practices.
S3 Bucket Exposer
Frequently leaves cloud storage buckets publicly accessible, risking sensitive data exposure.
Non-Compliant Compliance Expert
Talks a lot about compliance but fails to implement compliant practices.
Always operates with the highest system permissions, disregarding the principle of least privilege.
Rejects the zero-trust security model, risking unauthorized access and data breaches.
Always Run as Root
Regularly uses root or administrator access, disregarding the best practice of only escalating when necessary.